I want to start this entry by sharing that i have learned and healed so much with the help and prayers and new friendships of those blogs listed to the right. Many of them are mommies of loss and/or mommies of trisomy 18 babies. It was by the unknown encouragement of some friends who took me into their play date group of boys all around the same age, and the fun they seemed to have with their blogs that got me on here, and then God took it to a whole other level when i was able to connect and share with moms and families who knew the grief journey too well. I have been reminded of the community of faith, that i am not alone, and that we are all in this together, no matter if we never meet on this earth. You have all helped me to "build my muscles", "rehab" this heart that is learning to beat again, and "doggie paddled" along side me as we swim back to shore. I preface this entry because before this week, even when a mommy of loss announced she was pregnant, i struggled. I WANTED so desperately to just celebrate. i felt SO behind.
Today, it is with great joy and a TINY bit of "what if" that i share with you all that we are expecting again! We are very early on (may-ish) but if Cana has taught us anything, it's that Life is to be celebrated from day 1. I will not live this pregnancy in fear...i will treasure the gift that God has again worked His miracle, allows US..a taste of glory as He shows me how to lay down my life so another may live. I feel grateful that we have been able to conceive 3 babies..with no trouble with infertility..i don't want this to be "in your face" for those who do struggle with infertility, longing for more babies. I just want those mommies to know that this heart knows how blessed we are.
I know that it's early..and believe me...we know anything can happen. But we also have shown ourselves that we can trust. And no matter what, i'm a mom of 3 now.
thank you for celebrating with us. Please pray for us as we journey down this new path.
I will still be posting the last of Cana's days with us. Her grave marker will be in soon. I can't wait.