Saturday, October 10, 2009


The past few days have been filled with more grace than I could have imagined.  And while it's true what they say, the lead up and anticipation of the 1 year anniversary of the death of your child is worse than the day/s itself....i can only imagine how much harder these past few days would have been without all your prayers.  We truly felt covered by all of you.  I personally feel DIFFERENT today.  I actually felt different as we drove away from the gravesite.  It was like  "ok. we got thru that year.  It's time to look ahead now."  That one year anniversary was just a huge black cloud..a black hole, if you will, which seemed to just suck the life and joy out of my days.  I really do FEEL like i can walk a little lighter.  I thank you all for carrying this burden and sorrow these last few days.  I felt every single prayer, and every offering.  I know the body of Christ spent some time at the gates of Heaven for us this week.

Oct. 8 - we went to The Aquarium Restaurant for lunch.

 After lunch, we picked up cupcakes for cana's bday.  And at 432pm, we sang happy birthday and let travis blow out the candle.

 For dinner, we ordered Italiano's and shared some time with family at home.  Elizabeth included, of course.  Cause she's family.

Oct. 9 - I slept in, then mitch took a nap.  We all woke up late from naps to rush around trying to get out of the house in the pouring rain, to be at the gravesite around 415/430 but I decided to have some spectacular morning sickness as we were getting ready...slowed us down to make our arrival there about 5pm.  (sorry jamie!)  We picked up some flowers, brought the cupcakes, towels, and some umbrellas.  On the way there, the sun poked thru and God reminded us of His promise and covenant with a very quick and beautiful rainbow.  Ah..that's just like God to do that!  We really wanted to create the celebration mood and i think we did!  My adopted parents, Jeanne & Duane, even came out in the rain.  And, of course, Elizabeth, my crutch, was there too.  She brought Cana some daisy's.

 Then we came home and enjoyed some Arroz con Pollo, ala Grandma, and just vegged, enjoyed the time together, and honestly...felt a renewed joy...esp. since the first real cold front of the year rolled thru.  Mitch and I opened the windows, watched some "HOUSE" and shared how neat it was that God gave us some nice cool weather on her resurrection day anniversary.  He said "you know...i wait 365 days for this moment..and He gives it to us tonight."  Timing.

Today, Oct. 10, was the MEND "walk to remember."  We took travis and shared a quick walk, a really neat sharing by Nancy Guthrie, some praise and worship...and then they call your child's name/s and you are allowed to place the personalized ornament on a tree.  Then we all head out to the parking lot for the balloon release.  *we had coached travis on this all day....because he's deathly afraid of losing his "other" balloons (free balloons at the grocery store, etc) as we walk to the car, so i told him we were ALL going to let them go..up up up to Heaven, to celebrate Cana's bday.  At first, he was pretty panicked, then I think he got it, and we really enjoyed watching him experience this.  It was overwhelming to see them all.  Pink for girls, Blue for boys, and white for miscarriages.  Heartbreaking.  But so beautiful to know all our babies are dancing with Jesus.


  1. I love it I love it I love it!!!!!!

  2. Your hearts have been filled with God's light., Christ's love surrounds you daily. Peace fill your hearts for you are loved. Prayed for always and forever by those that know your pain. Touched by Angels above who watch over you always. We send our hopes and love forever more. Thank you also for sharing your lives with us.
    Love you, G-pa Mike & G-ma CJ

  3. I prayed for you today. We had altar call at church and I prayed for you. Specifically. I hope you are blessed beyond measure, my friend.

  4. I am so glad you are now on this side of the 1 year mark. I'm thankful the Lord showed His mercy and grace to you through the last few days. I have no words about the rainbow, except WOW!! He really does love us.

  5. Perfect. Really.
    May each day increase the joy and decrease the sorrow:)

  6. What a great celebration for Cana and I love all the pictures you shared of her bday and of the walk. I really love Cana's marker and the saying is so perfect.

  7. Ok, I'm weeping now. What a beautiful birthday party. You are so very brave.